


Learning to Romance

by MoonlightIcarus



Category: Metal Gear
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different First Meeting, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst and Fluff and Smut, Angst with a Happy Ending, Boys Kissing, Cute, Eventual Smut, First Dates, First Kiss, Humor, Kissing, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Slow Burn, Snake is Dummy Thicc, Sweet
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-17
Updated: 2020-01-17
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:54:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 10,840
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22283710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonlightIcarus/pseuds/MoonlightIcarus
Summary: Things are going well for David Pleskin. He's held down a stable job for three years. His relationship with his dad is better that's it's been in a while. His mortgage is almsot paid off, and even his dog seems to be happier. Now if only he could get a date that actually goes well.When an old friend sets him up on a blind date he take sit because honestly it can't be worse than some of the people he's seen recently.So I've finally proof read it. Enjoy.
Relationships: Otacon/Solid Snake
Comments: 3
Kudos: 10





	1. Get Up Like You Should

David hated mornings. Not the "Oh, I wish I could sleep in" kind if hatred. This was the "If I had a nemesis it would be the physical embodiment of the early hours of the day and I would be ready to maime them with my bare hands if I ever saw them," kind if hatred. This wasnt at all a new development. Actually it had been building for years, and it was a cruel irony from life that since he hated mornings he was so good at waking up and being productive during them.

Even as a teenager, when he woke up on weekends he would be lucky to sleep past 7:00 on a good day. He didn't know why he was like this and it wasn't like he didn't want to to back to sleep but he simply couldn't. Of course that doesn't mean he didnt try to sleep in. He would lay in his bed desperately wanting unconsciousness to take him back under where he could enjoy not thinking. But, by 7:30 on those same mornings he would be out of bed anyway.

It wasn't just that he didnt want to be up, but also that he had nothing to do during the wee hours. He was never one to procrastinate (not to the extent that his classmates did at the very least), so he never had any homework to do. And if he actually had plans like a soccer match or being able to go out with one of the five people he could call his friends, those plans where set for 11:00 at the earliest, because his friend, much like all the normal people of the world, were still asleep.

During those four hours a day he had that noone else cared for he spend it jogging around his neighborhood and lifting weights on his dad's weight bench. The goal was never to loose weight or gain muscle mass (but they did happen and he couldn't really complain about it) it was another attempt try at exhaust hismelf to the point he could get back to sleep. Surprising absolutely no one his plan didnt work, because getting adrenaline pumping through your system is pretty counterproductive to the goal of sleeping.

Adding to his annoyance were his dad's lectures for using his weight bench. He wasn't mad that David messed with his things. No, he was annoyed that his son did the foolish and dangerous task of a strenuous workout while alone. Which did show good parental priorities on his dad's part, but it only threw more fuel onto the fire.

At some point along the way his dad started getting up at 9:00 to jog with him and spot him when he used the weight bench. So, yay for the father son binding moments, but again not the point of what he was doing. He still had about two hours alone on miat Saturdays and all of Sunday morning sinse his dad never ever got up on Sundays. Those times were still spend in silence as he worked out by himself.

And somewhere in there an early morning workout became a habit that would bite him in the ass later. Like after high school later. Enlisting in the military later.

Being both a) an early riser b) someone who was well acquainted with long and exhausting physical activities and c) the son of a somewhat renowned ex special ops made him a time target for all the abuse from his drill sergeant after he stared basic training. It was so focused on him and only him that one of the higher ups stepped in to reprimand his Sargent on singling him out.

Turns out there is actually a legal limit that a commanding officer is allowed to shout at and use other ways to punish a specific officer. Most people dont know it exists at all but his entire platoon had a briefing on it becuase of him.

Once he moved passed Sergeant Overcompensation, (he couldn't remember the guys name even if it was the password to shut down nuclear missiles aimed directly at him) things were technically better. At least in a social sense, but his hatred of the morning was ever present.

He was sent on two tours in Africa, which he would call standard, but that's like saying a normal family exists its really just something your aren't overly famiar with. Coming home from the second tour he was offered a position to become a Green Beret. He gladly accepted it, well he would have accepted even if he didn't want to because this wasn't the kind of thing you turned down.

It happened. Really it felt like more of the same to him. He went on several difficult missions but nothing really high profile in any way. His tine there wasnt wasted though, because it kind of unintentionally lead to his current job as a translator. While he wasbtraining there they had him learn five additional languages, and as it turns out people who speak both Farsi and Russian are in high demand with businesses now.

Then he came home again, some stuff happened with his dad that they're both slowly moving past. People say healing takes time but neither of them were really pushing to meet up and talk again, but they are both required to see a therapist bi-monthly, who suggests they see each other on a consistent basis. They both agreed to it and things are going pretty well now. Still work to be done but nothing is perfect.

Hell, he even got a dog. A female husky who was blind in one eye, who he named her Colonel. Why did he name his dog Colonel? Becuase he used to work under a man that everyone called Colonel and there were plenty of times when he could be a real fucking bitch.

It would be wrong to say he was a bad man, but he had the tendency to smother people. He called multiple times each week to check up on David. How the man chose to spend his retirement was entirely up to him but he could be a bit of a mother hen while still calling you out on your bullshit in the same conversation. Someone was liable to get whiplash from it.

It was really trying to set him up on a date that set David off. The old man had been off the saddle longer than he'd been cognitive, and here he was trying to play matchmaker. So what if he had a great track record for helping him in life that didn't mean he needed to over reach.

Yet, he didnt say no. He just asked that whatever weird date he set up it at least be a lunch date. There's been quite a few of those he's been on recently. Lunch always feels so much less serious and noncommittal compared to dinner, and more often than not he payed, and a lax lunch was easier on his wallen than a fancy dinner. It's not like he really desperately needs to save money but why should he waste money when he doesn't need to.

The first meeting was set to happen in an hour and a half at 11:00, and he'd just completed his workout for the morning. Even after years of his life he still worked out every Saturday morning. It was obviously stupid to get sweaty right before a date but if he didnt do it he would be angsty and restless for the entire day.

He needed to get out of these clothes and shower before he left. The place they were meeting was only a twenty minute drive from his house but that didn't excuse him being overly lax in his pace. For all the knew the other person had a full schedule today and their date was already going to be a time crunch.

His stripped down in his bedroom and walked into the master bathroom. Turning on the faucet the water was almost immediately hot. Is it sad that one of the reasons he even wanted a house all to himself was he never had to worry about hot water running out on him?

The water was right before the scalding point. A warm shower was one of those pleasantries you never want to give up again after you lose it for the first time.

It was short and thorough. David fully expected this date to fail but he wasn't going to shoot himself in the foot before things even got started by smelling like a cow when he showed up. It wouldn't help his losing streak when it comes to love, and it wouldn't be fair to who ever it is he was set up with.

They deserved his respect, even if they walked out on him the moment they made eye contact. After all it wouldn't be the first time it happened. For any number of reasons it could have happened. His mullet was often the first thing people saw and that main then turn tail, or maybe it was how he dressed. He was really overdue for getting dressed come to think of it. 

The water was shut off and he grabbed the towel he set on the toilet lid to dry himself off. He wrapped it around his shoulders and walked back to his bedroom.

He started with one of his black jockstraps and slid it up over his legs, making sure to re5sr the waistband higher in the back than in the front to frame his ass as best he could. Jockstraps were the only underwear he'd worn for years by this point. His ass was jsut too big for anything else. Anything big enough to fit his ass would have been excessively baggy and droopy, or it would punch up and rub against him in the wrong way. And going commando lacked any appeal to his, especially since he kind if went outside in jsut his underwear.

After he had his jockstrap on he got on his compression shorts that were also black. It was important to match the colors because he didnt plan on wearing anything else over his pelvis and he didnt want his dick to awkwardly poke though or be highlighted by a contrasting color combination. He was well endowed enough that he didnt need any help in that department, and a double layer of protection was good. 

His ass was being squeezed by them but everything felt like it was squeezing his ass too tightly, and compression shorts like these were the only thing he didnt have to worry would tear on him in the middle of the day. More than three suits had been ripped right down the seam because he accidentally bent over too far and the fabric was evidently not enough to handle it, so he wore compression shorts. They were the extra short, square cut style. So much of his thigh was exposed that they also could be categorized as botty sheots but that wasn't how they were advertised so that's now how he typically likes to describe them.

There was a week where he tried wearing full length compression pants, but the squeeze on his thighs was downright painful and he swore his legs weren't getting proper circulation because of it. So he opted for shorts instead.

Then he slipped on a a grey Henley that was a tight fit over his torso in the best way. He liked showing off with pure sex appeal, even if it was often too much for a first date. Two people suggested he dress more more casually in the future, but to him this was dressing casually. If you aren't comfortable in your clothing than it's not casual wear, and this was comfortable for him.

He followed up the shirt with black wool knee socks, but you wouldnt think they were wool based on how they so neatly conformed to the shape of his leg. You might even mistake them for nylon or a similar material. They just covered his knee caps, leaving the meat of his thighs exposed, the liberal use of elastic woven into then kept them in place on his legs and prevented them form slipping down. It was too cold to just leave his legs exposed but he was more comfortable like this anyway. Said thighs had just been shaved last night so he had no qualms about exposing them. Though the only time he ever really covered his thighs was when he had to come to do a live translation (many people had him translate over the phone unless they had an important face to face meeting that required a translator present the entire time). The air had turned colder recently and where others disliked a cool wind on freshly shaved skin, he revealed in it.

There was that temptation to tub his legs together at the feel of the high quality fabric on his freshly smoothed legs. It made the long and arduous task of shaving his legs and applying lotion worth it. So much effort was put into it not just for other but also for himself. But if he spent all his time reveling in himself he'd wind up missing his date all together.

He shoved his feet into of his black leather boots and pulled on his old, beat up leather jacket. He could easily afford to get another one, but the worn look really completely the aesthetic he was going for. He's been told from the waist down he he looked like a 90s stripper and from the waist up he looked like a 60s biker. He just took it as someone's observation instead of as a compliment or an insult.

Passing by the mirror he looked hismelf over and was distracted by his reflection. All large calves, thicc thighs, and an absolutely massive ass that protruded out past where his jacked came down around his waist. His lower body was the more muscular part of him, but not because he worked on it more than his upper body. It was just how his body filled out naturally. Back when he was a teenager going to soccer practice his ass started to grow, and it got bigger with his constant workout regiment on Saturday mornings. Doing nearly any physical activity got it bigger and bigger. His muscle structure had a reasonable balance, but his ass always bulged out from his body. He'd never seen anyone with an ass quite as big as his, a few people had come close but they never matched his. Maybe not the best things to be proud of, but to each their own. While he looked down he spotted where his grey bandana was sitting on the vanity next to his wallet, phone, and gloves. He put his phone and wallet into the pockets of his jacket that had zippers on them and then zipped them shut. There was a reliance on pockets in his jackets since his "pants" didn't have any. As for the bandana he wrapped it over his forehead, covering his hairline. It made the mullet more manageable, or so he had been lead to believe. It was another of the habits he had developed over time. Change was always something rather fickle to him.

Somethings seemed so obvious and easy to change and as for other things he just couldn't see his life going on without them. Asking him to go without his morning workout would be like asking him to stop breathing, it was natural to him.

There would be time to reflect on his inability to change after his date failed. Well maybe it would be a good idea to think more positively about things. Simply by law of averages it was only an inevitability that his love life would turn around eventually Even if it was just for a single day.

Colonel was out cold on the rug in the den when he passed by her. She had the most sporadic sleeping schedule of any creature he'd met. Sometimes she would stay up for what seemed like days on end without ever resting, and then there had been times when he literally had to carry her out to the yard so she didn't just do her business wherever she was lying down at.

The first time it had happened he believed she was sick and dying. But a trip to the vet insured there was nothing wrong with her. When he brought her home though he still doted on her needlessly. There was rarely a moment when he left the same room as her and her food and water bowls had been moved to just outside of her reach so she couldn't accidentally knock one over, but she would only need to move about a foot to get to them.

And after three days like that she was back to being as energetic as she was before. Some people could tell when their dogs were happy but David was never one of them. She appeared to be happier but there was this forlorn nature and tension that always rested within her. Rescues like her often had a rougher past than they really deserved, so he would do his best to keep her comfortable. Most days his morning runs double as a walk for her but today she was still asleep by the time he was ready to go. Maybe this was the start of another of her long sleep cycles, but he couldn't know until tomorrow, maybe tonight if he was really looking out for it.

The bottom line was that she didn't look distressed so he could lock up and get to his date. His keys were in the little glass dish by the door that he always left them in. If they ever ended up in another location at his house he might as well buy himself a whole new house and bike becuase he wouldn't be able to find his keys again. Thankfully there were there like he remembered and he flicked off the light in the den before he pulled on his fingerless leather gloves and stepped outside to lock up.

The nip the January air had to it was wonderful. He lived in Michigan because after the humid heat he had experienced for all his life he wanted to have literally the exact opposite of that and it was one of the best decisions he ever made in his life. There were some people who questioned how he could go around with his thighs exposed in this weather but it didnt bother him. His crotch was covered as were his calves and shins so he was all good to go for a ride.

He drove a 1990 Honda Valkyrie. Not really new or anything but it was still in impeccable condition thanks to his dad. It had been his project while David was overseas and then it was given to him as a gift or as his dad called it a "Coming home safely present" even if it had been given to him after he had already been back for two years. He knew the real reason behind the gift and it meant a great deal to him.

The bike itself was parked in his driveway and kept under a tarp. He would have put it in the garage but that was currently full of a ludicrously large number of cardboard boxes. 

He saved all the ones from his move because he just liked boxes and it's not like it was bad to keep then around. You couldn't come by the good ones all that often anymore since most furniture either came in a thin box before being assembled at home or it was transported in a covered truck and needed no container at all.

Really if he ever brought a date home, he expected a full out lecture on his hoarding habit, but it was literally just cardboard boxes, there wasn't even anything inside them, they were all empty. Even certain things he should care about for centimental reasons he could easily get rid of. He didn't because many of them were things he'd got from his dad after he moved into an apartment and he didnt have enough space for it all, but it meant something to him and that was enough of a reason to hold onto it. 

It helped that it was real furniture and useful items instead of just a million little trinkets that don't do anything besides take up space. It was all functional items like lamps, tables, and chairs. On principle his dad asked if he wanted the old weight bench, but its time had come and he turned it down, his old man wasn't disappointed or anything. He straight up said that he offered it only because he no longer needed it and David might want it. But he didn't need it because he actually purchased a whole new all in one weight set for himself to use, and that what currently occupied the small spare bedroom he had. 

The spare room was so small that it just brealy held the weight set and nothing else. It clearly was made as storage space and not a full bedroom that was expected to be used readily. 

"Maybe I should get a shed." He'd seen some that were big enough to act like a second garage, and the property was his so he could do whatever he wanted as long as he didnt break the one rule of the neighborhood, and that was no farm animals or livestock. Seeing as he had little desire to start a farm that was easy to abide to.

But seriously a shed would be a good investment and he could move the boxes out to the shed, put the weight bench in the garage, still have enough space to park his bike in there, and then he would have the spare room for whatever he wanted. Yeah he would need to look into prices later.

Thoughts like that never occurred to him because the house was still being paid off but soon it would be his entirely and he could do whatever he wanted with it. Sure he could do things now but he wasn't one to take risks like that. He tended to lie in weight for the right opportunity to present itself.

"Date." He needed to say it to himself since his thoughts kept drifting to other things. Maybe he'd just passively accepted that all his dates weren't going to work out and that's the reason his mind was occupied by anything else even marginally entertaining that the world had to offer, but if you dont try you never win, so it was time to double down and focus.

The blue tarp was flung to the ground and he put on his helmet and inserted the key after mounting it. The engine always had a nice purr to it without being excessively loud, this was a neighborhood after all not some backwoods dirt road where he could do whatever he wanted. Being part of civilized society was just kinda like that, and he had no qualms with it. Lile sure he could rev up the engine until the gas ran out and he went deaf but he had no desire to do those things.

He had last parked with his bike facing the road so he could pull out straight onto the street. The speed limit in the neighborhood was technically 15 mph but he was really the only one that followed it. There were lots of kinds in the area amd there was no reason to needlessly endanger them, plus he was already on thin ice with one of the mothers around here. 

She was frankly distraught and appalled by the way he chose to dress hismelf, even though several families had houses with pools so seeing people going around in their swim trunks was a regular occurence in the warmer months and his attire covered much more than a swimsuit. Even if no one was going to be swimming right now he chose dress in a similarly manner year round, with the only real discernable change being what fabric his clothes were made of. Something like using actual nylon instead if just wool that someone may mistake for nylon.

He made a right turn out I'd his neighborhood onto the main road. Now it was just a straight drive to the cafe where he was supposed to have his date. While he had planned for about twenty minutes of travel time it could take anywhere from seven minutes to forty to get there all depending on traffic. 

On a Saturday it might be a little congested but nothing extraneous or awful unless there happened to be some bizarre town festival he had completely forgotten about. 

And even if traffic was bad he could make the walk in a little over half an hour. Hed been on the fence about weather to walk or drive there but his decision had been made by the aforementioned mother who would use him walking through along the street as an excuse to claim he was improperly dressed and leaving a bad impression on the children. He did his morning jogs on the other side of the neighborhood, but the street only had one outlet and it required him to pass by her house. 

It was amazing she had kids, got married, or even found someone to deal with her overbearing craziness, but the most unusual thing was how nice her husband was. That man was genuinely one of the most pleasant people David had even met and yet he chose to marry that high strung mess of a woman. Maybe she was different before marriage and after she changed he was too nice to want to leave her, or maybe their sex life was fucling magical, or it could even be that they're making crack in their basement and he can't turn away profit like that. 

He's inclined to discredit option three becuase when he came over to their hosie for a neighborhood BBQ one time the house had a distinctly not methy feel to it. 

People like that made him second guess the concept of a longterm committed relationship, but that desire for company other than a dog would always rear its ugly head. Maybe he could supplement the desire with a close group of friends, but he could feel that it was a craving for deep intimacy.

He made it to the stretch of road near the cafe so he would need to start looking for a place to park. That was one of the biggest benefits when it comes to driving a motorcycle. It doesn't matter that he can't parallel park to save his life because he can just pick up his bike and sit it in a spot along the road.

There was an opening coming up and while he was still three blocks away from his destination he would rather walk now than have to loop back, find this spot taken and then have to go even farther away, resulting in tardiness on his part.

When attempting to pull into the spot he about half made it in and he dismounted and picked up his bike to move it another two feet over. He was a little out of breath from it but that should calm down by the time he managed to reach the café.

The sign above his space said "THREE HOUR PARKING ON WEEKENDS." 

That wouldnt be an issue for him. Things would either end early on or in the unlikely event they did go well he didn't see this taking up more than an hour at most let alone the more than the two and a half he would have after accounting for the time it would take him to walk there and back again.

Each footfall on the sidewalk was light and relaxed. The walk wouldn't take much time at all and traffic had been even lighter than he expected on account of the weather. A cold front had moved in overnight so most people who didn't have to work were staying home for now or they were simply still asleep like they usually were on a Saturday. He could expect all that to change within an hour as the sun rose higher into the sky amd people were awoken from their slumber.

There were a few faces he recognized and he waved to them. Not all of them were people he knew intimately, for even though he lived in the town of Patcherson he commuted to Landsing for work. 

For a while he just lived in Landsing until an opportunity fell in his lap. That opportunity came when many jobs moved out of the state and their was a short unemployment crisis. It was a sorrowful development, and it stung that he actually benefited from the change but he honestly got a great deal on his house once all the mortgages fell. That's why he had almsot paid off his mortgage even though he hadn't even lived there for two years. The price he was given was ridiculously low and since he was never one to really indulge in anything he was able to pay it back at significantly more than the minimum rate.

The story wasn't all bad for the community either. Grey Fox(the company he worked for) had expanded and created hundreds of jobs in the local area, doing a great deed to those who were able to stick around through the hard times.

It was good news but there were still many people who were sceptical of this windfall. There was now a major reliance on Grey Fox and everyone learned from Detroit that overrelaince on a single industry or company is a dangerous bet. So, with scepticism people took the new jobs that were open to them.

Really it was sad that he didnt know the names of the people he was passing by on the street. They were his neighbors, amd some he even recognized as coworkers, but it took a great deal more than just casual familiarity and passive interactions for someone to stick in his memory. 

"This is it." 

It was Black and Bean. The main place he went to when he wanted to get out of the house for a while but he didnt actually have anything to do. Also the location of more than a dozen failed dates. After he hit thirteen he stopped counting so he didnt know the exact number of them but it would be a pathetic number to think about.

The little bell on the door rang when he entered. There were still seven minutes until his date was supposed to be here so he went ahead and got in line to order.

David looked to the menu even if he had no reason to actually do so. Previously he'd sampled their entire selection and he came to realize he liked everything they served thay didn't have ham on it. He doesn't dislike ham itself but something about the ham they served here never agreed with his stomache. Maybe it had something to do with being so close to Canada?

He stepped up to the register and saw that it was Miriam working the register today. She was an older lady who was retired but she had the job becuase apparently she couldn't just sit around all day after working her whole life. That was a sentiment he could agree with, doing nothing wasn't just boring, very often it even became agrivating for him.

"How are you today, David?"

"Good, I've got another date today, and we'll see how this one goes."

"Maybe its work this time."

"Maybe."

"So have you decided on an order?"

"Yes, I'll have a medium mocha and the turkey bravo."

""$11.26"

The conversation ended there and he paid with his card before taking a seat to wait for his order and his date. Sitting down at a table is when he realized a major flaw in this whole sceme.

He had no idea what the other person looked like. On previous outings he had a profile picture or at least a basic description to go by but here and now he had nothing.

It could be male, female, short, tall, old, young, blond, ginger or any number of other variables that he was unprepared for and unaware of.

"David!" His order was called from behind the counter and he stood top quickly and his chair squeaked. He took his food off the counter and instead of returning to his table hewent to sit in a booth that had a clear view of the entrance, so he could look out for someone he didnt recognize too well.

He looked and overanalyed each face but they all seemed to blend together for him. The food before him hadn't been touched and he contemplated eating and leaving when someone approached his booth from the side.

"David Pleskin?"

"Yeah, that's me."


	2. Law of Averages

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> First dated are adorable, and honestly neither of them is the best at it but god do they try.

"David Pleskin?"

"Yeah, that's me."

David turned my head to face him and was surprised by what were there. It was a grown man who honestly looked adorably flustered. The first thing to draw his attention was that hair. It was long locks of brown and it looked like the guy was going grey at an early age, if the dissonance between the wrinkles on his face and the percent of his hair that lost its colors was anything to go by.

It wasn't bad, not at all. It really worked for the guy and it framed his face well. He had a sharp jaw line from what he could see of it. 

His eyes were like dark chocolate they were so brown, and on top of them were black framed square glasses that clung close to his face.

He had both a grey turtleneck sweater on and a heavy white winter coat over it. Evidently he had just stepped inside, becuase his ears and nose were red, and there was a faint chattering coming from his teeth as he warmed back up.

"I'll take it you're my mysterious date."

"Affirmative." He definitely looked too cold to be called healthy. It was alarming just how much the weather was obviously affecting him.

"Why don't you sit down and I'll go order you a coffee to help you warm up."

"Oh, thank you." He slid into the open side of the booth while David got up and walked over to the counter. 

He was hoping to have a conversation with the man before he started jduging him based on his appearance, but the guy didn't seem to notice him at all. He was far more focused at huddling in the booth while he looked down at his hands wringing together in his lap.

It was adorable in its own way. A cute moment that people usually won't let others see but apparently he'd reach a point that he didn't care.

Leaving him alone almost seemed like a mistake, but he looked a bit sick so sitting down and resting was for the best. An illness wasn't something you wanted to have on a first date and it likely wasn't his fault if that was the case. The man couldn't even have cancelled if he wanted to because they had no way of contacting one another, and if they tried to do it through the Colonel he'd likely assume one if them was just trying to cancel on the other and he'd leave things as they were anyway.

"Need another drink David?"

"Well my date might be proving that you can get frostbite across your entire body so I'll stop him before it gets too serious. Can I get another Turkey Bravo and a large black coffee. I've got no idea how he takes his coffee so I'll let him mix it himself."

"$10.88."

This time the coffee took only seconds to pour because it could just come straight out of the pot, and the kitchen was in full swing by now so food was just flying out of the back. 

"Here you are."

"Thanks." His seat mate was still looking down and didn't even crane his neck up until his coffee and sandwich were placed right in front of him.

"I didn't know how you take your coffee so I just got it black. You can have my mocha if you want something sweet instead, it should still be pretty warm."

Two things crossed the other man's mind then. He needed that mocha now and David had the sexiest voice in the world. The grovel and grit it had made it sound like he ate rocks for breakfast, and it was a sound he already liked.

He snatched up the chocolate beverage that had been offered to him and started to drink it down at a pace that didn't allow him to breath in.

David spoke again while he was guzzling.  
"So, you clearly know my name. How about you tell my yours. That way we're on equal footing."

He finally broke away from his coffee to answer. "Hal Emmerick." It was pretty shameful on his part. This attractive man was sitting across from him and one of the first things Hal did to him was drink his coffee. If luck was on his side he at least wouldn't have any coffee on his face from trying to quench his ravenous thirst.

"Nice to know your name finally. The Colonel didn't tell my anything about you so I was flying blind for a while there."

"Really?" He broke away from his coffee again. It was more than half gone now, but the worst of the shivers had subsided. "He didn't say too much, but he did talk a bit about you."

"Hopefully at least one good thing was mixed in there."

"He told me what to look out for."

"What does that mean?"

"Well his exact words were something to the effect of; look for the most attractive man you've ever seen."

Yeah, they were coming back to address that later. David was going to make sure of it

Hal continued, "And if nobody there fits the description just look for a guy with a mullet and a bandana."

"He hasn't even seen me in years how does he know I kept the mullet?"

"He may have also mentioned something about, you not being the blessed with change."

"Hmmm."

"So then he's right?"

"I feel like either answer makes me look bad, so I just wont answer." No use in starting an argument and shooting the messenger.

"Not really helping your case here. First impressions are everything."

"My first impression of you is you shivering like it's in the negatives outside when it's still above twenty."

"Sorry I get cold easily." Hal's words came off as overly defensive so David sought to settle him.

"Dont stress about it, but are you doing better now that you have something warming in you system?"

"I mean...I'm not cold anymore. Still wouldn't say I'm exactly at my best."

"Something wrong?"

"Just intimidated by attractive people. That's all."

"I'm truly flattered you think that."

"Hey I didn't say it was you I could be talking about the barista." But it was because of David. Hal could look at his face for a time far longer than what someone would call appropriate.

"Muriel, is sweet but she's also retired and married, so that ship has sailed."

"Guess I'll go for you then."

"So I guess we should talk. Preferably about something that's not related to the Colonel or the barista."

"Why don't you tell me what you did for the holidays. I know it's kinda dreadfully mundane, but you have to start somewhere." He spoke in a manner that confirmed he was second guessing anything he said, and it always gave David an out to change the subject if he desired to do so.

"I didn't do anything that interesting. Saw my dad, made some food, watched Die Hard with him, exchanged gifts, and then went home." His dad gave him the top half of a suit for when he had to do video conference calls. He knew about David's aversion to standard pants and only bought him the shirt and jacket. They both could have been hand me downs from his dad, because the guy either wore a full suit or went around in gym shorts and a tank top  
He really had a good duality going on there.

But it was probably new as neither one extended below the waist. Exactly how David liked it, becuase a normal shirt and coat would stick out awkwardly over the large curve of his ass. The shirt was the kind that was made to be worn untucked and the jacket had been tailored to be the same length as it. A very thoughtful gift on his part, but describing the specifics and why they were the way they were wasn't a subject to broach right now.

"Oh you're one of those people who think Die Hard is a Christmas movie."

"It takes place on Christmas eve."

"So does Child's Play and that was actually released in December unlike Die Hard which came out in July."

"Fair point. Truthfully I always Preferred A Good Day to Die Hard but no one wants to celebrate the holidays with that."

"Maybe I should go back and watch it some time. I never made it past the first one."

"Oh, why's that?"

"Same reason I never made it past the first Final Destination movie; it looked like more of the same and you can easily look up the best parts of the movies online."

"Ah, I gotcha."

"So you just saw your dad and watched debatably season movies for the holidays."

"Sums it up pretty well. That's how I've spent the last few Christmases, actually. You do anything interesting?"

"I never got to see my family in person." He paused and then continued on as if he realized the possible implications of the statement that he needed to smooth over. "Its not because we're on bad terms or anything, but I've been moving and I only managed to call them with all the stuff I had going on."

"Why did you move? You don't have to answer if it's too personal for you."

"Its nothing like that. The company I work for just got bought out by Grey Fox, and they had me move up here closer to their regional headquarters."

"So we share an employer then." A fleeting work romance wasn't something he planned on but with the sheer size of Grey Fox dating just about anyone in the area would mean dating a coworker.

"You work for Grey Fox as well?"

"Yeah, I've got a contract with them as one of their translators, for overseas business. Not at all a bad job, but some weeks I'm doing nothing at all, and then others I barely sleep with all the meetings I'm needed in."

"Interesting. How many languages do you speak?"

"Six in all, but they mostly need me for Russian and Farsi. There's also been the odd meeting here and there in Japanese but it's not too hard to find a translator for that."

"You learn all that in college?"

"No, learned it in the military. Being multilingual is sort of an unwritten rule when it comes to specialized work. My dad was in a similar situation and he speaks three languages because of it." He wasn't someone who was made for college life.

"Specialized work! So were you a navy seal?"

"Not quite that specialized. I was just a Green Beret, which is nothing to scoff at but still pretty far from a seal."

"Well you certainly get around."

"I did for a while there, though now I'm happy to slow things down and maybe grow some roots."

"A good sentiment."

"I've talked enough. Now its your turn, Hal."

"You might be disappointed by my story. I had a pretty mediocre life. Nothing to really complain about. I went to college and got a Doctorate in computer programming, and then went straight into the work force.

I got a job working for a game company and I absolutely hated it, but I stuck around for two years so it didn't look like I had issues with committing to a job. After that I ended up bouncing around some smaller jobs for a year, before landing at a company called Fox Hound. It was pretty good for a while there and then there was a big scare after Grey Fox bought them out. Thankfully they tried their best not to fire anyone and just transferred them to different locations.

I was living in Colorado for all that time, but then I had to come up to Michigan to stay employed. Fortunately they cover the moving expenses, but I had to find a new place to live all on my own. Apartment hunting isn't fun, in fact it's the third worst part about moving."

"What's first and second?"

"Well I thought I would he the weather, and the weather does still suck. Colorado didn't get much snow around where I lived so having temperatures constantly hovering around the freezing point is an adjustment. 

Though the worst thing is the time change. I've had to deal with jet lag in the past, but it was absolutely nothing in comparison to moving here. My internal clock still hasn't changed to match the time and it gets dark at like four in the afternoon." 

Well that explained why he looked so tired and worn down. He hadn't been able to get a proper night's sleep. "So I'll assume you aren't happy about the move."

"How I feel about it is irrelevant. It was necessary to keeping my job and now it's all over and done with. Mostly I'm just focusing on limiting my caffeine intake while I get used to the time change."

"I wont sugar coat it, this is going to be a real adjustment, and then daylight savings time will happen sooner then you think. That'll set you right back to where you started.."

"I figured, but I'm already sick of getting up at what feels like four in The morning to me even if all the clocks say six. And what's even the point of daylight savings anyway. People always say it's for farmers but they just work from pitch black in the mornings to pitch black at night."

"Don't some places like Arizona not even do the time change anymore?"

"Yeah its them and Hawaii that just skip out on it now. Maybe we can learn a thing or two from them."

"Mail your congressmen. You can do it when your waking up at the wrong time and use it as an excuse to get to work late."

"Even if I wasn't being screwed by geography and time itself, I'm not what you would refer to as an early bird, but I get up at ungodly hours anyway, because I have to."

"I've always been an early rises, so I know how it goes."

"You're a morning person?"

"Not per se. I'm good at getting up early, but it's not something I enjoy or strive to do on a regular basis. It just happens weather I want it to or not. I've learned to live with it."

Talking with Hal felt simple. They both seemed ready to listen to what the other head to say and it made the idea of accidentally oversharing uncomfortable plausible. 

There is certainly merit to letting out the crazies during first impressions, but people will only tolerate so much at once. At the minimum it's good to discuss any interests before talking about your crazy backwoods uncle who thinks GMO foods and vaccines are injecting nano bots into your body. That example wasn't his but rather that of someone he worked with back in basic. It's sad he could remember that story yet not the name of the man who told it to him.

The conversation started to reach a lull so he tried to back petal to an early point because he didn't want it to be over yet. That was a rare sentiment for him to have. "Weren't we talking about holiday plans some time ago before we got onto this tangent about time zones and the pointless idea of daylight savings time."

"I do believe we were. So tell me how you celebrated new years."

What David did on new years was he got ear plugs and noise cancelling headphones to drown out the loud sounds of fireworks being shot off at midnight, while he held colonel close to both comfort her and reassure himself. She didn't like the loud noises either so he comforted her and used the light shaking of her body as an indication to when the noise had died down.

He handled the repercussions of combat better than many if the men and women he served with, but on nights when the sky was full of explosions he didn't trust himself not to overreact to it. There were tears shed when he felt the ground shaking at night, but he kept himself together after all.

Finding out about his PTSD with explosions was an event almost as bad as the combat he had seen. If he was lucky enough to be able to forget one of the memories honestly he couldn't tell you which one if would be he got rid of. Neither was good, one showed him the horrors of mankind, and the other made him look at the danger he posed to others weather it was intentional on his part or not.

"I didn't see the ball drop or anything. Just went to bed like I would on any other day."

"Yeah, it's one of those holidays that's better when you can get drunk with a group of friends."

"You don'texactly sound like you had friends to get drunk with."

"I was still moving at the time, so I stayed up and felt thoroughly underwhelmed."

"I don't get why people get excited about it. It's a holiday that literally lasts all of ten seconds. Halloween is a full night, and Christmas can last like an hour depending on how long it takes to do things, but New Years its the exact same short span of time each year."

Hal took another sip of his coffee, but found that his cup was now empty. "I'm gunna go get another coffee, you want anything while I'm up there?"

"You don't need to get me anything."

"Come on, you paid for my lunch, so this is only fair."

"I was being just being nice." "Yes, and now I'm being nice so tell me what you want." There was strong conviction behind his words even though it was just a conversation about coffee. "Alright you can buy me a small mocha while you're up there. But make sure it's a small I don't need the extra calories."

"Okay, be back in a second."

Hal was amaze and surprised. His date was going so well, and it was with a guy who looked like a an in person pornstar. 

When he first walked in and he saw David he thought he was still dreaming. The man was a mix of biker and grunge styles. And his beard was so carefully trimmed that he wanted to feel it scrape against him skin. Plus against all logical reasoning David managed to make a mullet look good.

He felt like shit sliding into that booth across from him. He looked like so much less compared to him and all he could think about was David's physical appearance. When he showed up he had the intent to apologize for being late and looking like shit, assuming that once that was over the other person would leave all together, but in that moment he was so distracted by how David looked that he could say nothing more than his name to make sure he had the right guy.

The colonel was toying with his emotions. dangling such a perfect person before his very eyes knowing that Hal was unable to live up to that standard of beauty. Did the man honestly think these two were compatible. David was an adonis and he was a mollusk by comparison

It was so pathetic and shallow of him to view him like that. When he first got up from the table leaving Hal alone he thought that his date walked out and left him because he looked pathetic while he was standing there shivering, but David came back and things were going better than he ever would have predicted.

It was only a first date so he could have easily been looking to into it, but this could be the upswing he needed since he had to pack up his life and move to another state. His feet just got back on the ground and now he could try and do something that pleases himself.

He could do more than just live day to day. But he'd wait until after he'd gotten to know David to ever talk about his interests. People at the best of times could overlook his otaku habits but usually they just broke off their relationship because of them.

Maybe he should just avoid ever talking about something like that. He wouldn't ever get this far with someone so handsome ever again. Though that was also due to the fact that he never expected to see someone who looked so perfect ever again. He could lock that part of himself away in a drawer (both literally and metaphorically) and never discuss the topic or indulge in it when David was around.

"Hi! How may I help you?" The older woman behind the counter asked.

"Could I please have one media caramel latte and one small mocha latte."

"Is that all?"

"I think so. My friend over there wasn't really gungho about me buying him some more coffee." He vaguely waved his hand in the direction of David and made sure to be broad enough in him movement to not single him out specifically, but she knew exactly who he was referring to anyway since the cafe was mostly empty. The majority of the customers got their coffee to go and didn't linger around for long, leaving David as the only one sitting in that area of the restaurant.

"Oh. So, you're David's date."

"You know him."

"He comes in here quite a bit. He sometimes vents about the woes of his love life."

How does someone so magnificent have romantic troubles? "Does he like kill puppies or something? That's the only thing I can think of that could drive people away from someone like him." He said it jokingly but now he was curios.

"God no, nothing like that. He's made of stronger morel fiber than a victorian corset. That'll be $7.56, sweetheart."

"Okay." Hal handed his debit card over to her. 

What could it possibly be? This lady just said he was a good person and his face was so enrapturing that he was terrified David caught him staring and thought him weird for it.

The woman was speaking to him again. "Here's your card. If you just want to step to the side while your order is getting made." He followed the instructions and got out of the way for the next customer to come up to the counter.

While waiting his thoughts turned into a cluttered war zone. "Everyone has dirty laundry...right? Is he a felon or something? God I'm being shallow all over again. Letting his dating history color my impression of him. I don't deserve someone like him."

They didn't even bother call his name because he was right there to pick it up. Turning after taking the two mugs he was back to a blank mind in the wake of David's profile. "Like you couldn't even genetically engineer a face to be that attractive if you tried." David himself was looking at something on his phone, he closed whatever it was the moment Hal began approaching the table again.

"Reading something?"

"Checking my schedule actually. Lots of conference calls this week and then a live meeting on Thursday."

"Ah, he joys of being a salary employee. You can work ninety hours a week and still only make as much as you would if you worked ten hours a week."

"Just means I have to make the most of the weekend. So tell me, have you finally finished moving or are you still in the process of doing that."

"I'm done with it, finally. I could have been done days ago, but I was doing it slower than I had any reason to. Just didn't feel motivated, ya know."

"Not really, I'm not one to procrastinate, but that doesn't mean I'll do something well; just means I'll get it done early."

"It happens." Hal really didn't know how he was supposed to react to that, so he went to something generic."

"Hey, now that you're done moving all your stuff you can actually spend you time doing things you enjoy instead of spending all that time unpacking boxes."

The statement prompted him to say what he did in his free time. That was something he didn't want to answer truthfully. Saying "I spend my time reading manga and playing video games on a first date would be the equivalent of shooting your foot at the start of a marathon.

"Reading." He finally said in a hurry. It wasn't fully a lie, only a partial one. He did read it was just in the from of manga and the heaps of text in his games that he was reading instead of a normal book.

"Nice. I spend most of mine working out, or just doing stuff with my dog. It's not that easy doing more social hobbies with my inconsistent hours, but I agreed to this job and I only have myself to blame."

"You have a dog?"

"Yeah, a female husky. Her names Colonel."

"That because of our friend the Colonel?"

"Exactly, they can both be real bitches."

He got a good laugh out of Hal with that. "I'll assume he doesn't know about that, or else you wouldn't be on the best of terms with him."

"Yeah, I haven't told him. He knows I have a dog but if he knew her name or why she has it I'm pretty sure he'd drive up to my house just to lecture me about respect."

"Glad I'm not the only one he's like that with."

"How do you know him? Did you forget to mention some military training you were doing? Or maybe you were also a special operative?"

"I met him though Fox Hound. We were developing radars for the military and he was one of their representative. It's our close relation to him and the military that helped most of the people from Fox Hound keep their jobs after Grey Fox bought us out. And then when I told him I was moving up here he said there was someone I needed to meet."

"Never thought he'd add matchmaker to his resume, but so far he's doing really well with it."

"You think things are going well?" There was surprise and hope coloring Hal's tone.

"I do. I haven't had a conversation this entertaining I months."

"What, you don't get joy out of long discussions of products and stock exchange rates?"

"I don't." The graven in his voiced was more pronounced then but it lightened up when he continued. "Three hours into it and your interest will start to wane. We've been going on for about an hour and a half now and things are still going strong."

"Oh, shit we've been here for that long." Oh, how the time had escaped him.

"Yeah, did you have somewhere important to be. Sorry if I took up all of your time." Guess his date really did work on a tight schedule after all.

Well he didn't NEED to be anywhere but his friends had scheduled a massive group game to try out the newest update of the MMO they play together, and the wifi in his apartment was finally up meaning he could join in for this round. "I was planning on chatting with some friends I haven't talked too in a while." Again not a full lie, simply an omission of the whole truth. "I could reschedule it for another time though." He didn't want to leave, but he was desperate to play. God he felt like a dick.

"Well we can end things here so you're not too late."

"Oh no, I don't want it to seem like in blowing you off, or trying to cut things short."

"You're not. This has lasted many times longer than my previous dates. And we can end things here so long as we make sure to set up a second date."

"A second date?"

"Generally that is what follows a first date, isn't it?"

"I didn't realize things were going quite that well."

"Well maybe you need to have a little more confidence in yourself, but you need my number if we want to set up another date, now won't we."

"Oh yeah here's my phone, add your number and I'll text you right back to give you mine." As the phone traded hands Hal was happy that he recently changed his lock and home backgrounds to the logo of an in game guild he'd recently joined. It wasn't too otaku like to set off any warnings or drive David away. The only way he would know what it was is if he played as well and that issue wasn't even an issue at all.

"Here. I already sent a message to myself so I could get your number."

"Okay well this has been great." 

"Same to you." When David stood he thought that maybe they should shank hands. He didn't know what gesture to do to end a conversation like this one, and anything he contemplated felt wrong. A handshake seemed too formal, but a hug or something similar was too intimate for a first meeting. 

But then Hal stood up as well and he could see the man giving him a once over. If things took a south turn here because of his appearance it would dampen the good mood he'd just entered.

Hal himself was anything but disappointed. David was hotter that he thought. He'd been someone who liked people with cute little butts, but David's was large and straight too sexy and he'd only glimpse it from a peripheral angle. Those thighs were like thick tree trunks that were left bare, and his calves looked like they were flexing even when he was just standing still. All this wrapped up in an outfit he would beg on his knees to see again. 

"Holy fuck you hot."

"Not the usual reaction but thank you for the compliment."

"Sorry, sorry, I feel like a total creep now."

"I'm flatter, really. I've had some people take one look at me and turn tail because they didn't like how I dressed."

"You sure it wasn't just them feeling inadequate to how you look?"

"If I think like that my ego will grow too big too fast." David began a walk to the door and Hal followed nearby. Taking a quickly look down at the full view of David's ass where he almost fainted from the sight of it. "Now when you walk outside you should be warmer than you were before. The sun is shining down harder now, so hopefully you can avoid catching a chill like that again."

"I'll hope for the best." The cold wasn't as harsh but he was still someone acclimated to warm weather. "I'll go find an uber over near the center of town you have a good day then." That ass was burned into his retinas for better or worse. He might have been ruined for good when it came to nice butts.

For a second head turned to walk away when David spoke again. "Just one more question for you."

"Shoot." He hoped it wasn't some last minute rejection.

"Earlier you said that the Colonel told you to look for the most attractive man you'd ever seen, and I wanted to know how accurate that was."

Fuck coming on too strong. He wanted to be honest right now. "He was dead on."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please leave comments if you have criticism or compliments. I enjoy them with equal fervor.

**Author's Note:**

> Tell me what you think


End file.
